When I was a young reporter, not long after I graduated from college, I worked for The Ann Arbor News, a daily newspaper based in Ann Arbor, Michigan. Ann Arbor was a good newspaper town with a highly educated and engaged readership, thanks to the University of Michigan. It was a strong newsroom as well with a group of very talented reporters.

My “beat” was covering Livingston County, which at the time was the fastest growing county in Michigan. It was full of interesting stories and I covered all of them — from high profile homicide cases to land development issues and typical governmental disfunction. I ended up with a lot of page one stories and high-profile pieces.

So when the editor of the paper handed out his Reporter of the Year award, I felt I was a shoe-in. I had a banner year with story after story hitting the front page. The editor always gave out the award in the newsroom — a large open bullpen that looked a lot like newsrooms on television or in the movies. The entire newsroom was watching as he started talking about the winning reporter in glowing terms. He noted the front page stories, hard work and great reporting as he walked toward my desk.

“The Reporter of the Year is…,” my editor said, building the anticipation.

And he handed the plaque to my friend Paul, who sat right next to me. I think I audibly gasped. I was shocked and stunned. I was also happy for my friend, who deserved the award as well. But I was jealous, oh so jealous, of him getting the award and not me.

We’ve all been there. Jealousy in the workplace is real.

I received an email recently about a survey conducted by The Dating News that took a look at jealousy. While I don’t much care about why people get jealous in the romantic sense, the section of the survey results that focused on jealousy in the office caught my eye, mainly because of the situation I outlined above. Did other people get just as jealous as me (the answer is ‘yes’)?

Here are the top three reasons American workers get jealous:

1. Your co-workers have nice things. 57% admitted to coveting their peers’ wealth/possessions. (i.e. all of the Gen Zers that are jealous of their homeowner co-workers).
2. Those six-figure salaries that seem unattainable. 5 in 10 Americans (54%) envy their friends/siblings’ salaries.
3. Your co-worker gets that promotion you totally deserved. 45% of Americans get jealous when a co-worker gets bumped up the ladder.

And if you’ve ever wondered what the most jealous state is? The answer according to the survey is Delaware where 57% of respondents said they feel jealous when their co-workers get promoted. 51% reported being jealous of their co-workers’ salaries.

Jealousy, of course, is extremely counterproductive, especially in the workplace. Once I thought about the hard work my friend had done throughout the year, I was happy that he won the reporting award. He deserved it. And I understood that the jealousy I was experiencing stemmed from my own feelings of inadequacy.

I will leave you with this fantastic Arab proverb: “Love sees sharply, hatred sees even sharper, but jealousy sees the sharpest for it is love and hate at the same time.”